Nick Adams’ official 2023 Mock Draft
The time every NFL GM and Scout has been waiting for has arrived! THis is the authoritative guide to how the 1st round of the 2023 NFL Draft SHOULD go.
1. Carolina Panthers (Team Needs: QB, LB, WR, RB)
The pick: Will Levis, QB, Kentucky
Levis thrived as soon as he escaped the woke shadow of Penn State coach James Franklin. Kentucky head coach Mark Stoops hails from Youngstown, Ohio, a deeply pro-Trump region of the industrial midwest, and was the perfect culture fit to get Levis’ career back on track. I expect strong chemistry between Adam Theilen and Levis, as the veteran WR and rookie QB both share a love for God and an insatiable desire to play the game the right way.
2. Houston Texans (Team Needs: Everything)
The pick: Lukas Van Ness, EDGE, Iowa
The most dominant pass rusher in the draft is a foundational piece for the Texans' rebuild. When he lines up on the edge, Van Ness attacks the offensive line with the passion and fervor of Donald Trump attacking America’s mortal enemies. Once he adjusts to the Texas heat, Lukas will feel right at home in Houston. Texas is a state that backs the blue, supports President Trump, and embraces the Second Amendment, all of which are very important to the stud Iowa Hawkeye. Van Ness reminds me of an even more explosive George Karlaftis with a little bit of JJ Watt thrown in.
3. Arizona Cardinals (Team Needs: QB, OL, WR, LB)
The pick: Peter Skoronski, OT, Northwestern
Skoronski is the big guy needed to keep Arizona’s little QB upright. In addition to his impressive football skills, Skoronski will bring his conservative values to a state President Trump is poised to win back in 2024. He’s the best pass protector in the draft and will build a wall in front of his QB from any position, whether he sticks at tackle or shifts to guard. His presence is sure to frustrate both the illegal immigrants pouring into Arizona from the southern border and opposing pass rushers. Personally, I’m most looking forward to watching Skoronski clash with fellow pro-Trump alpha male and divisional foe Nick Bosa twice a year for the foreseeable future.
4. Indianapolis Colts (Team Needs: QB, OL, DB)
The pick: Aidan O’Connell, QB, Purdue
The Colts stay in-state for their next franchise QB and select AOC, the gunslinger from West Lafayette. O’Connell is a prototypical pocket passer with a high football IQ who plays the game the right way. The Colts are desperate for a spark to get them moving in the right direction, and O’Connell is the flashy pick they need to reignite the fanbase. I expect to see AOC and Malik Willis duking it out for second place in the AFC South behind Jacksonville for years to come.
5. Seattle Seahawks (Team Needs: DL, LB, QB)
The pick: Bryan Bresee, DL, Clemson
Seattle allowed the 3rd most rushing yards in the NFL last season and will need to clean that up if they want to return to the playoffs in 2023. You know Dabo Swinney instilled his strong Christian values in Bresee, so he’ll be a solid addition to the locker room as well. If Bresee can stay healthy, he projects as an Aaron Donald type of player, but with a higher football IQ and fewer violent outbursts.
6. Detroit Lions (Team Needs: TE, CB, DL, WR)
The pick: Michael Mayer, TE, Notre Dame
Mayer has future franchise TE written all over him. He leads, arguably, the deepest TE draft class in recent history. He’ll have no problems adjusting to the physicality of the NFL with his impressive frame and strong base. Mayer is the perfect choice to fill the gaping hole left by the trade of TJ Hockenson and gives Jared Goff the playmaker he needs to replace the suspended Jameson Williams. Mayer is a graduate of Covington Catholic High School and played his college ball at Notre Dame. You’re not only getting a good player on the field, but you’re also getting a spiritual secret weapon and Christ-centered presence in the locker room. Detroit’s TE room just got a LOT closer to God!
7. Las Vegas Raiders (Team Needs: QB, DB, DL, OL)
The pick: Stetson Bennett IV, QB, Georgia
The Raiders made the questionable decision to move on from Derek Carr this offseason but opt for a grizzled veteran and back-to-back national champion with their first pick. Stetson Bennett is the next Drew Brees and will delight Devante Adams with his smart and scrappy playing style. Bennett’s two championship rings will instantly win the respect of the locker room, and he’ll feel right at home in the swing state of Nevada after 7 years of college football in Georgia. A great case could be made for Bennett to be the first QB off the board, so Raiders fans can rejoice in nabbing a top QB without having to trade up!
8. Atlanta Falcons (Team Needs: LB, RB, QB)
The pick: Jack Campbell, LB, Iowa
Campbell is one of Kid Rock’s biggest fans and the clear-cut top LB prospect in his class. The Dick Butkus Award winner is an old-school, big-bodied LB who dominated at Iowa and wowed at the combine. When he isn’t listening to Kid Rock’s hit song, We the People, he’s outshining his teammates in the weight room and the classroom. One look at Jack Campbell, and you can tell he is a beast on the field and a brilliant mind off it. He earned academic All-American honors as a senior and has incredibly good taste in music. Campbell is built for contact and thrives in the box, the perfect building block for a Falcons defense that needs an alpha dog to right the ship.
9. Chicago Bears (Team Needs: OL, WR, DL, LB)
The pick: Charlie Jones, WR, Purdue
The Bears FINALLY get Justin Fields the elite weapon he needs to elevate the offense in 2023. Charlie Jones isn’t the biggest WR on the board, but he possesses blazing speed and showed what he was made of during his breakout senior season with Purdue. His route running ability, strong work ethic, and soft hands allowed him to pull in 110 passes for over 1,200 yards last year. Jones’ 2022 numbers were mind-blowing, although it’s worth noting he was catching passes from Aidan O’Connell, one of the most talented passers in the country. He’s the perfect WR1 for Justin Fields and will be a fan-favorite in Chicago for many years to come!
10. Philadelphia Eagles (Team Needs: QB, RB, LB)
The pick: Drew Sanders, LB, Arkansas
Sanders is one of the most athletic LBs available and a strong advocate of our Constitutional Right to Bear Arms. He’ll need to lean heavily on the Second Amendment once he arrives in the corrupt and crime-ridden city of Philadelphia. Sanders will provide reinforcement for Nakobe Dean in the middle of the Eagles “D,” while his love of the game and high football IQ could earn him defensive play-calling duties right out of the gate in Philly. The temptation to go QB with this pick will be real, but Drew Sanders brings a high-character, masculine, alpha male presence to the locker room that the Eagles will need down the stretch if they want to make it back to the Super Bowl.
11. Tennessee Titans (Team Needs: OL, WR, TE)
The pick: Tucker Kraft, TE, South Dakota State
The staunch conservative brings a strong Christian presence to the locker room and a game well-rounded in both the receiving and blocking departments. His faith will provide him with instant chemistry with the Titans franchise QB and fellow Christ-follower Malik Willis. I’m not high on the Titans this season, but I am very high on this pick.
12. Houston Texans (Team Needs: Everything)
The pick: Nolan Smith, LB, Georgia
Defense wins championships, and new head coach DeMeco Ryans is going to build on his strengths and go all “D” in the first round. Smith would tell you that size doesn’t really matter at the edge position in the NFL, and he might be right, at least in his own case. What the Georgia Bulldog lacks in size he makes up for in speed, fluid motion, and intelligence. You wouldn’t be alone in thinking Nolan Smith moves almost as beautifully as Herschel Walker, just on the other side of the ball. He’s fallen well behind the top-two linebackers on draft boards because some teams have whispered that he may not love the game of football the same way Jack Campbell does. Although it may take him a few years to reach his full potential and adjust to the physicality of the NFL, I believe his studious attitude will help him become a difference-maker in Houston.
13. Green Bay Packers (Team Needs: QB, WR, TE)
The pick: Luke Schoonmaker, TE, Michigan
The Packers turn the page on the Aaron Rodgers era with an explosive TE pick in the 1st round. Schoonmaker’s football career was inspired by Tim Tebow and remains motivated by his strong catholic faith. He shone brightly in his final season at Michigan, channeling his best Tim Tebow impression and carrying his team to the CFP Playoff for the second consecutive year. Schoonmaker is an explosive athlete for a man of his size, clocking a 4.63 40 time at the combine and an elite 3-cone time of 6.81. He’ll be one of the Packers’ top targets moving forward.
14. New England Patriots (Team Needs: WR, OL, DB)
The pick: Riley Moss, CB, Iowa
Moss is the quintessential Bill Belichick player. High football IQ, has an impeccable work ethic, and does his job. Moss is fast and physical, the perfect plug-and-play fix for the Patriots' weak secondary. Absolutely can’t miss athleticism. Moss is one of the most explosive athletes at the corner position I have ever seen, and he brings a certain element of swagger to the CB position that most DB prospects in this year's class lack. If not for the abundance of QBs and TEs at the top of this year’s class, Riley Moss would be a virtual lock to go top 5. The Patriots are getting a STEAL here, no cap!
15. New York Jets (Team Needs: DL, LB, OL)
The pick: Derek Parish, DE/LB, Houston
Derek Parish runs around blockers almost as fast as he runs to the front row of the church on Sunday mornings. Parish will bring his lightning speed, strong faith, and a tireless work ethic to the Big Apple as the Jets take flight for the Super Bowl with Aaron Rodgers.
16. Washington Redskins (Team Needs: DB, OL, QB)
The pick: Paris Johnson Jr, Ohio State University
Watching the Redskins play the Cowboys the last few seasons has been like watching a history movie. The Redskins need some protection from the Cowboys’ genocidal pass rush, led by MAGA Micah Parsons, and will be thrilled to grab Paris Johnson Jr. If the Redskins want to defend the Potomac, their offensive line will need a new chief to spearhead their efforts in the trenches. Johnson, who was once recruited by Urban Meyer, is one of the best blockers in the draft, has a massive physical and spiritual presence, and is exactly the type of competitor you can build around.
17. Pittsburgh Steelers (Team Needs: OL, DL, DB)
The pick: TJ Bass, OT, Oregon
Pittsburgh hits a home run with the big masculine TJ Bass falling into their laps at pick 17. Bass is light on his feet but heavy on intelligence, shown by his steadfast support of Candace Owens on Twitter. Fear not, for TJ Bass has taken the red pill. As a young man born and raised on the woke west coast, TJ may require some time to adjust to his new blue-collar environment in Pittsburgh. But the free-thinking values of the hardworking Trump voters who make up the vast majority of the Steelers fanbase will make Bass feel right at home!
18. Detroit Lions (Team Needs: CB, DL, WR)
The pick: Myles Murphy, DE, Clemson
After playing Robin to Bryan Bresee’s Batman at Clemson, Myles Murphy will get his chance to shine in Detroit. He will bring his impressive flexibility and polished pass-rushing techniques to a Lions team that struggled on the defensive side of the ball last year. Murphy’s already strong faith in God was bolstered by his three years with legendary Christian Dabo Swinney, which helped propel him into the upper echelon of DL prospects in this year’s draft.
19. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (Team Needs: DB, QB, OL)
The pick: Antonio Johnson, DB, Texas A&M
Antonio Johnson is a young man who loves Christ and hates Wide Receivers. His alma mater, Texas A&M, just canceled a drag show on campus, so he will feel right at home with the franchise that shares a city with Nick Adams (Alpha Male). He plays football the way President Trump leads, with ferocity and power. Johnson will thrive in anti-woke head coach Todd Bowles’ system.
20. Seattle Seahawks (Team Needs: DL, LB, QB)
The pick: CJ Stroud, QB, Ohio State University
Despite the loaded QB class this year, Stroud manages to sneak into the first round and finds a great fit in Seattle. As arguably the strongest Christian in the draft, CJ Stroud will be able to adjust to the NFL without pressure while sitting behind resurgent Geno Smith as Seattle moves to the next phase of their accelerated rebuild. If CJ studies his playbook with half the intensity he studies the Bible, he’ll be poised for a long and fruitful NFL career.
21. Los Angeles Chargers (Team Needs: WR, DB, OL)
The pick: Cody Mauch, OT, North Dakota State
The Chargers are a soft team. They folded in the playoffs against a Jacksonville team whose toughness was forged by the legendary Urban Meyer. LA needs an alpha male in the trenches to set the tone, and they get one in Cody Mauch at pick 21. Raised on a fourth-generation family farm in North Dakota, Mauch progressed from sweatily throwing around bales of hay to throwing defensive linemen on their backs without breaking a sweat. His midwestern values and agricultural work ethic will be a breath of fresh air for the soft Los Angeles team in desperate need of alpha male leadership. I love this pick.
22. Baltimore Ravens (Team Needs: WR, OL, QB)
The pick: Clayton Tune, QB, Houston
The Ravens QB of the future has arrived, and he’s driving a big lifted Ford Truck. Baltimore returns to their roots with a Flacco-esque passer to lead them into the future. Tune first appeared on my radar when he made a hole-in-one at the Golf Club of Houston’s 14th hole, an intimidating 170-yard par 3. He’s a strong follower of Christ and an outspoken supporter of Tim Tebow, so all the intangibles are there. As long as he finds a home course in the greater Baltimore area that fits his game well, he’ll quickly settle in to become a pillar of the Baltimore Ravens franchise. I’d suggest he check out Burning Tree Club, an all-male country club in Bethesda. It will provide him solace from the unwanted female attention that comes with being the stud QB of an NFL franchise and give him a safe space to work on his golf game.
23. Minnesota Vikings (Team Needs: WR, DL, LB, DB)
The pick: Jaxon Smith-Njigba, WR, Ohio State University
Minnesota continues to build around Kirk Cousins, finding a new weapon to replace the departed Adam Theilen. Smith-Njigba’s outspoken Christian faith will be the foundation of his connection with Kirk Cousins, and he’ll benefit from favorable matchups while pro-Trump Justin Jefferson draws double teams. I expect another massive season from Kirk Cousins and the Vikings’ offense as a result of this pick!
24. Jacksonville Jaguars (Team Needs: LB, OL, CB)
The pick: Dalton Kincaid, TE, Utah
The Jaguars have been in need of a field-stretching threat since Tim Tebow was forced out of the NFL in 2021, and it showed in their playoff loss to Kansas City. Jacksonville is a team on the brink of greatness, and the addition of Dalton Kincaid could be the missing piece they need to win their first Super Bowl. Kincaid is the perfect WR/TE hybrid who can dominate smaller men in the slot and use his big 10.5” hands to suck in balls in a wide catch radius. When Kincaid isn’t getting his hands on Trevor’s balls on the football field, they’ll bond on their knees in prayer together. He’ll be a great culture fit for Trevor Lawrence and carry on the great Jacksonville TE tradition started by Tim Tebow.
25. New York Giants (Team Needs: WR, DB, OL)
The pick: John Michael Schmitz, C, Minnesota
The Giants smartly locked up Danny Dimes and will look to fortify their rushing attack with the top WR options off the board. I’m told New York is looking for a big strong guy on the line who can plow some holes for Saquon Barkley to run through, and John Michael Schmitz fits the bill. He’s one of the best run blockers available at any position and utilizes his big strong body (6-4, 320lbs) to create space in the middle of the field. Schmitz is a girthy player who gets low and thrusts forward off the ball to create huge gaping holes deep in the heart of the opposing “D.” Saquon will be hard-pressed to find a hole that his new center hasn't already demolished. New York is getting a true penetrator in trenches in the Minnesota stud.
26. Dallas Cowboys (Team Needs: TE, DL, RB)
The pick: Sam La Porta, TE, Iowa
La Porta caps off Iowa’s legendary 2023 first-round class by finding a home in Dallas. La Porta may be smaller than some of the other TEs in the class, but he is a menace in the passing game. For the record, I have no concerns about his size. In fact, quite the contrary, I think his size is an asset. Height is no way to measure a man. Look throughout history; men like Napoleon Bonapart, James Madison, and Winston Churchill all changed the world despite their smaller stature. La Porta has nothing to be ashamed of and will prove the doubters wrong. He boasts the body control and route-running ability of a receiver and is a guaranteed mismatch on any LB in coverage. He’s dependable, works hard, and has an incredibly high football IQ. A great value late in the 1st round for Jerry Jones and the Cowboys!
27. Buffalo Bills (Team Needs: WR, OL, DB)
The pick: Luke Wypler, C, Ohio State University
Josh Allen will LOVE this pick. The Bills get their center of the future and a smart player who has experience playing at guard in the near term. Wypler is a lunch-pail type of guy who was one of the highest-graded interior linemen in all of college football last year. His firm grasp on the fundamentals of getting down and dirty in the trenches will make for an easy transition to the NFL for Wypler. Prior to his stint dominating the Big Ten at Ohio State, Wypler graduated from St. Joseph Regional High School, the alma mater of Andrew Guiliani, former special assistant to President Trump, and son of America’s Mayor, Rudy Guiliani. I’ve been told Wypler is a sponge and has no doubt absorbed some incredible insights from his time near the Guiliani family at St. Joseph. This knowledge of winning and exposure to excellence gives Wypler an edge that Josh Allen and the Bills need to get to the next level.
28. Cincinnati Bengals (Team Needs: QB, DB, LB, TE)
The pick: Isaiah Foskey, LB, Notre Dame
His California roots gave me pause, but learning that he hails from De LaSalle High School, the same catholic school that produced Maurice Jones-Drew, eased my doubts. The Bengals will shock the world and opt to bring in a high-character, catholic-educated player, ending a long line of thugs like Pacman Jones, Chris Henry, Vontez Burfic, Joe Mixon, Tyler Boyd, Cedric Benson, Rey Mauluga, Andre Smith, Josh Tupou, MacKensie Alexander, Darius Hodge, Leon Hall, Frostee Rucker, Akili Smith, and Corey Dillon.
29. New Orleans Saints (Team Needs: WR, DB, DL)
The pick: Scott Matlock, DL, Boise State
The Saints need a big, strong guy to shore up their run defense and the defensive lineman from deep within Trump country is the perfect guy to fill that hole on their roster. Matlock is an avid golfer, a proud American, and a certified beast on the inside. He loves foursomes with the boys and hitting QBs almost as much as he loves his country. He’s a masculine guy who draws inspiration from Elon Musk, Andrew Tate, and Joe Rogan. Will be a perfect fit in Derek Carr’s locker room.
30. Philadelphia Eagles (Team Needs: QB, RB, LB)
The pick: Max Duggan, QB, Texas CHRISTIAN University
With Gardner Minshew out of the picture, the Eagles have a clear and present need for QB depth in the event Jalen Hurts sputters down the stretch the way he did last season. Max Duggan carried his team to the CFB Playoff despite the woke NCAA’s best efforts to keep a Christian university out of the title game. At best, Duggan supplants Jalen Hurts as the starter, and the Eagles flip Hurts for a king’s ransom of draft picks and playmakers. At worst, Duggan replaces Gardner Minshew as the best backup in the league and pushes Hurts to be more consistent and focus on his fundamentals. This pick is a no-brainer for Philadelphia.
31. Kansas City Chiefs (Team Needs: WR, RB, OL, LB)
The pick: Andre Carter II, LB, Army
The Chiefs are Super Bowl champions, so they have the luxury of taking the best player available to close out the 1st round. Andre Carter II is an absolute beast, a true physical specimen. Standing at a towering 6-7 and a chiseled 260lbs, he’s the type of guy you can’t take your eyes off of. He was a sack machine his junior season and has the tools to develop into a game-wrecking edge rusher in a few years. Carter enrolled at West Point under the Trump administration, so his patriotism could never be called into question. President Trump supported the US Military more than any president in American history, and the Chiefs can signal their support for his 2024 bid by taking one of his most loyal footsoldiers in Andre Carter II.
PLAYERS TO AVOID:
Jalen Carter, DT, Georgia
Jalen Carter is dropping off draft boards faster than patriots are dropping Bud Light. Carter should be in jail, quite frankly, as he poses a clear and present danger to public safety. Thugs like Jalen Carter have NO place in the NFL. I’ve heard that even the Bengals are turned off by Carter’s legal troubles. I wouldn’t be surprised if he went undrafted entirely.
Ryan Hayes, OT, Michigan
Hayes is a favorite of woke fanbases due to his support of Bernie Sanders’ socialist ideals, but I wouldn’t draft him under any circumstances. I’ve spoken to a handful of scouts who expressed serious concerns about Hayes’ ability to focus on football due to his interest in competitive Fortnite. If you have to ask yourself whether a prospect truly loves the game, he isn’t worth drafting.
Jalin Hyatt, WR, Tennessee
The Tennessee WR is a woke, effeminate beta male who follows the words of Bernie Sanders more than his coaches. Hyatt is a socialist democrat who folds under pressure and can’t match up against physical corners. Avoid him at all costs.
Jacob Slade, DL, Michigan State
Slade is a big masculine guy with a blue-collar work ethic. He’s strong enough to play inside and athletic enough to play on the end. Slade has flown beneath most of the media’s radar because he doesn’t fit the profile of a day-one draft pick, but I had a very strong 1st round grade on the big guy from Michigan State. When I scouted him in person, I was in awe of the way he used his powerful hands and mesmerized by the way his hips moved. I was salivating at the way he initiated contact off the snap and plowed into blockers with a masculine bull-rush move. I was excited by Slade and fully expected him to go on day one, but then I made a heartbreaking discovery. As I was inspecting Jacob Slade’s social media interactions, I found something disturbing buried deep in his Twitter likes. Slade had liked a tweet attacking Andrew Tate, one of the most recognizable and well-respected alpha males on the planet. To make matters worse, the tweet was from Greta Thunberg, the Swedish child who is alarmed by the weather. After I came to terms with what I had just seen, I made the tough decision to remove Slade from my draft board.
